The Good/Bad/Ugly from a couple sessions ago

The Good:

(1) Humanoid snake creatures swarmed the deck of the ship, overwhelming it with sheer numbers. The adventurers huddled together in two bands. The dragonborn and human found themselves surrounded, back to back. Suddenly, the dragonborn warrior executed a whirlwind series of slices and slashes, reaping the surrounding monsters as if they were corn cut down by a scythe. Moments later, the human's hide armor glowed blue slightly, as he perfectly mirrored the impressive move. Two whirwinds of death covered the ship decks. Blood shimmered in pools. Not a single creature survived the harvest.



The Bad:

(1) The party stared in a combination of fascination and horror at the massive ogre that attempted to wear the tattered remnants of a dress. "Who are you," inquired Leenia softly. "JANET AMBER. ME JANET," rumbled the ogre. The halfling quietly examined the rest of the room. "You're.. Janet?" asked Mara flatly. "YES! ME JANET."

"That can't be Janet," whispered the eladrin.

"Uh. Hey guys?" The halfling was staring up the flue of the fireplace. A delicate, feminine white hand dangled from the chimney. Motionless. Stuffed. Dead.

"Hey guys? I think I found Janet!" Rudy exclaimed.

The ogre roared in rage.



The Ugly:

(1) The dinner seemed delicious. And to many it was. Alexander took a bite of the asparagus and suddenly wheezed. He felt.. weaker. Alexander was offered a delicious strudel. Upon finishing, his healthiness was permanently less than before. The green beans made him less athletic. And the after dinner mint gave him gas.

Without question, it was the worst dinner he had ever had.

Ever.

Player Quotes:



(While chasing down three members of the cult of the infernal fang)

(1) Josh: The warlock casts a spell and darkness surrounds you.
Adam: Do you want to hang out in the cloud of blackness that eats your face?

(2) Ekerrath: Cuppies, make it do something.
Cuppies: I make it hit Rudy.

(3) Cuppies: Can I read the ancient text?
Josh: Try
Cuppies: History roll.. eleven. Arcana… 18.
Adam: I make an intimidation check. Can I read it?

(4) Josh: The floating disc appears to get lighter as it gets closer to the Citadel of Seasons.
Cuppies: Woah. How in the world do we know that the disc is getting lighter? We're walking next to it.
Josh: Because Rudy is riding on it.

(5) Erdan (to Mara): Our kind is dwindling. Seek out the lost ways and return them to the land.
Cuppies: Go forth and procreate with a lot of men.

(6) Erdan: You have done well, but I cannot reward you with gold or silver.
Mike: Or beads New-Orleans style.

(7) Mara (to Erdan): you have a letter for us?
Erdan: Yes.
Adam (to Mara): How did you know that?
Mara: A little bird told. Me.
Mike: She was hitting it during the fight.
Adam: She wasn't hitting anything else.


(Back with Erdan after retrieving the Seal of the Seasons)

(8) Rudy: He's asking Erdan the questions because he's on a quest.
Ekerrath: Those quests are not our concern.
Cuppies: Guess that's what happens when you don't get one.

(9) Cuppies: I.. uh.. hit the monster with my staff.
Josh: What's your to hit?
Cuppies: I have no idea. How do we do this?


(As we enter Castle Amber.)

(10) Leenia: "Please don't steal any rugs or tapestries from these people."

(11) Erdan: "You have my thanks. The facilities of the Citadel of Seasons are at your disposal."
Cuppies: Is there anything to drink in this place?

(12) Adam: Well, from that last fight we learned how it was to fight like a warlock.
Joel: You found a Dummies Guide to Warlocks?

(13) Leenia: I can't see in here.
Mike (chortling): Here, hold this, Leenia.

(14) Josh: You are offered a sumptious dinner. Beginning with salad. Do you partake in the tossed salad?
Everybody (uncomfortable): Uhhh.

(15) Leenia (to Richard Amber): You have a very fine house.
Richard Amber: Why, thank you.
Mike: Rudy makes a save versus bullshit.

(16) Rudy (to Richard Amber): If we are to be your guests for eternity--
Cuppies: Where the party at?!
Rudy: -- where the white women at?!

(17) Leenia: When a black pudding lands on a green slime, what happens?
Bob: Matter and Antimatter?
Josh: Green and chocolate pudding pops!

(18) Leenia: Wait! Don't kill it! What if it's the last of its kind?
Ekerrath: Then it's too effing stupid to know it's the last of its kind!